Tired doesn't even begin to express what I'm feeling today. I'm exausted, worn out, ready for the weekend..and it's only Monday. Sleep is becoming more and more rare. Between my aches and uncomfortableness and the kids, a solid nights sleep is unheard of and all it takes is one really bad night to knock me on my butt. Sleeping in is also unheard of. It's been weeks..upon weeks..upon weeks since I've slept in past 6:30. For those who have been pregnant, it's hard enough to be 30 weeks, let alone 30 weeks, 2 kids, one in the ER, and all the stress we have piled up on us at the moment.
Last night I was awake from 11-2:30 off and on. Uncomfortable and then little girl got up with bad dreams, thirsty, hungry, 'not tired', and I dealt with that stuff.. dozed from 2:30-5:30 and big girl was up because, well, I'm not quite sure but she got put back in bed.. 6am rolls around and big girl is up again saying her nose is bleeding. I pried my eyes open as much as humanly possible to see a small dot of blood on a tissue. Fine, whatever, go lay on the couch and watch cartoons. Then the next 30 minutes were filled with "mooomm, more bleed!" until I finally realized that any more sleep wasn't going to happen.
By 7:30 her nose wasn't any better and was ebbing towards worse so I called the tele nurse who told me to take her to the ER.. yay..ER run! Exactly what I wanted to do instead of sitting in my robe trying to be alert. Hubs came home and off we went.. and sat there until 10:30. She's fine, no worries. Dry desert air, blah blah, don't know why it won't quit. whatever. To the nice surprise that she couldn't go to school today. Unfortunatly today was Crazy Hat day and the day daddy got to eat lunch with her at school. So glad we worked on a stinkin crazy hat all weekend for her to not be able to wear. I actually had high hopes this afternoon, having both of them home, we'd all cuddle on the couch and watch a movie.. ya..not happening.
So now here I am.. No rest in sight because with two home they keep picking at each other and fighting and arguing and can't agree on one movie to watch. And as soon as there is a lull of 15 mins of quiet one of them comes up with a new crisis. The latest, big girl comes running up to be near tears because she has to go to the bathroom... so GOO!!! Don't tell me, Don't wail, just.. go.
On a more positive note, today I hit 30 weeks. wow. In less than 10 weeks will be having a little boy! Holy Macaroons! We're also counting down to March 12th, which is little girls spring break and Hubs is actually taking leave for two weeks! We haven't had leave without moving or a dire circumstance in... far too long. We will also be taking a trip to see Joshs grandma and for him to do some testing. I.. can't.. wait. A Semi-vacay. Work vacay..but vacay nonetheless! I'm trying to hang on until then, hoping after this little trip we will all come back recharged and positive and ready to tackle anything. Stress is knocking at every door. Uncertainty is around every corner. And at this point, I really see no light at the end of our tunnel.. our long term tunnel.
At this point we really really need a fresh dose of energy, rest, recouperation, and happiness and we are praying that comes fast! As for today, I will survive. Believe it or not, tiredness will -not- kill you and I will get through today. Tomorrow will take care of itself. I hope.
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