Heavy Cloud

Ever wake up and have those days where it seems like a heavy cloud is on you.   Today is one of those days.  I had trouble sleeping last night thanks to being 15 months pregnant and a swamp cooler that is going out.  Hubs starts his "field" time. They are "in the field" but not.  Thankfully  he's still within reach on post and able to come home at night but he's going to be working 5am-at least 6pm..more likely until 7 or 8pm every day for the next month.  Coming home stinky, tired, cranky, dirty uniforms everynight and no washer here at home.  Love that he isn't gone completely but with being so pregnant and dealing with the "daddy is home but he's not" thing doesn't sound so much fun.

The girls were up way way too early this morning wanting food and getting into stuff. Of course, yesterday, when Hubs got up with them they were content to play until 9am. This morning I got the "I want food" at 5:55am.   I woke up with painfully swollen feet and hands.  

I delivered both my girls at 38 and 39 weeks.. I'm 38 weeks today and I honestly cannot ever remember feeling -this- ready to have this baby than I do right now. I've always seen on tv where the pregnant lady is saying "get this kid out of me NOW!" and trying everything within her power to get the kid out but never experienced it, until now.  I even tried jalapenos yesterday and I don't even like jalapenos. Since having little girl my stomach is more sensitive to spicy food.

And to top today off... It's the 10 year anniversary of the passing of my grandma.  I woke up aware that something wasn't right today and then I remembered.  I miss her. So so bad.   It was untimely, not fair, and not right.  I'm sad she never met my kids. I'm sad she never met my husband. I'm sad she never saw me get married. It's all just not fair. I was extremely close to my grandma. The day she passed I just knew. I knew it was going to happen. I was at school, in choir, and I begged my teacher to let me use the phone so that I could call my mom and beg her to get me out of school. I remember telling her I just "needed" to be at the hospital with her. Thankfully she got me out of school and I spent the rest of the day at the hospital. We went home around 3 or so and at 4pm we got the call that she had passed. Had I not left school I wouldn't have been able to see her, to tell her goodbye, to see her one last time. Telling her goodbye was one of the hardest things I've ever done. Telling her it was okay to go.  Maam..I miss you. I love you. It's not fair and my life was forever changed. I can't believe it's been 10 years.

I've said for weeks now that I really hoped this baby would come today. I needed some "happy" memories on this sad day. I'll be honest though..I'm not totally convinced it'll happen today. Who knows. That would be amazing. To have my sons birthday today. What a beautiful treat. A gift.    We'll see what today holds. Who knows.

For now, it's time to kill this heavy cloud as much as possible with some buttery pancakes, syrup, and hot chocolate.

Kids Are So Honest

I'm getting the feeling my kids think I'm old, fat, and ugly. Last week little girl came up to me and said "Momma you old like my old baby doll" Mind you, the doll she was talking about is missing an arm and a leg and has unknown substances all over her princess dress. I guess the upside, if there is one, is that it's her favorite doll. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Then Big girl and I had the following conversation the other day at the Bus stop. BG: Mom, You sure were a lot cuter when you were younger Me: well dear...sometimes that happens. BG: And sometimes you stay cute forever like sissy and I will? Me:............ yyyyuuup.. Sometimes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ And then this morning I get hit with this: BG: Mom, how come your butt jiggles when you walk? Me: ............... I don't know BG: It does. Just like my teachers butt jiggles when she walks too. How come you're guyses butts jiggle? Me: oookay.. go play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I'm thinking after I have this baby I need to go on a major diet and have some plastic surgery to deal with my jiggly butt, ugly face, and old self. *sigh*

Tuesday's 10-Mornings Suck Edition

1. My fingers are swollen which makes doing anything fairly difficult and leads to a case of the dropsies. Spilled milk or cereal or dropped frying pans really put a damper on the day. The other day I didn't know Hubs had already opened the soy milk so I took off the lid, expecting the little safety tab to be on there, so I started shaking it up only to realize that the safety tab was not on there..I sprayed soy milk all over big girl, myself, the floor, the table.... ok, it was kinda funny.

2. my kids get up way too early and have much to big of a vocab for my liking. I dont understand half the words coming out of their mouthes

3. Cereal and milk doesn't fly in this household. My kids somehow got the impression that this is Dennys. It's a rare day when cereal holds them over for more than 45 minutes. I kid you not, I am making food from the moment I get up until nearly 10am. Breakfast for the girls, my breakfast, Hubs comes home and wants food, then I make his lunch, and wouldn't you freakin believe it the girls want a snack, then I gotta make big girls lunch. 7-10am I am in the kitchen making food or cleaning up food. every.single.day

4. My kids wanna talk about how old babies are and what day it is. I have no clue about these things in the morning. I barely know my own age on a good day.

5. I'm 9 months pregnant. Huge. and exausted. 'nough said.

6. I think hubs should just hook up a caffine IV when he leaves for PT every morning. Then maybe I can wake up bright and cheery

7. People are obnoxious in this Apartment complex. They are outside obsessivly honking horns every morning instead of using their cell phone and calling the person in the apartment to come out. Makes me wanna hurt them.

8. I really wish I liked coffee. It might make my mornings easier. My caffine is either iced tea or soda, which I try not to drink in the morning. I've tried to like coffee..I want to like coffee. I just don't.

9. I need 30 minutes of peace with the news on, my tea, and no kids jumping around me to get a nice happy start to my day...Unfortunatly that never happens.

10. At this stage it is really hard to get in and out of bed. It requires full body moving, grunting, and flinging of the legs. By the time I get out of bed I am out of breath. Another reasons mornings suck!

Ready for baby!

Disclaimer: There will be words like labor and prepping and such in the blog today... All squeamish men may want to not read further!


It's about that time where my brain starts thinking, "How can I get this baby out of me" This is the first baby that I will *Hopefully* go into labor on my own with so it's even more on my mind. I was induced at 38 weeks with my first and 39 weeks with my second.
My question for my blog lovers is what have you tried to get labor started?

With big girl I tried pineapple. Fresh pineapple is supposed to work to help get everything ready... It did nothing. I have no faith in pineapple. Also tried..uh..special quality time...... yah.. Did nothing. In fact nothing made big girl come out except pitocin, stadol, and 32 hours of such meds. Even then she wasn't happy about coming out.

With little girl I did lots of walking during that pregnancy, thanks to my platonic husband and our 3 mile death walks. I was also very active because Hubs was deployed the whole time so I was doing everything. I really didn't try many natual things because I was so busy just trying to survive daily. I will say the walking seemed to do a lot of good. I was in shape and had a much easier labor, even though I was induced. As for if it actually did anything to start labor, as I was in labor when I went in for my induction...not sure, but it did prepare my body for labor.

This pregnancy I tossed around the idea of taking an herbal supplement called Gentle Birth. It basically helps prepare the body for labor, not actually start it, but I decided against that for the sheer fact that we are so far away from any family and 30 mins away from the hospital, I didn't want to go into labor too early or not make it to the hospital as I also had two other kids to find childcare for. If I were closer to the hospital or had family close by I would have tried it, definatly. I have a feeling that this baby will be coming fast. In the end, in regards to Gentle Birth, I listened to my gut and my gut said not this time. I'm already starting to show signs of things happening when I'm up and around too much. Contractions are already starting, even though sporadic. It does keep me on edge though as I have never experienced going into labor on my own and have no clue how "MY" labors go.

I also know that this baby is a week ahead (due date wise) than what my doctor says. So it's definatly nearing, according to the doctor I'm 37 weeks this week, according to me, 38 weeks. In the next week or so I'm going to step up the walking, as much as I can, I barely made it through the mall yesterday.. I may try pineapple again, but more because I like the flavor of fresh pineapple than I think it may actually work. I've heard stairs work too, which isn't a problem thanks to our 2nd floor apartment.

Am I trying to start labor before lil man is ready? Nope. I am, however, trying to prepare my body for the easiest labor possible. I've had a hard labor and it is no fun and I do not want to be induced again. It's my experience that the easier the labors, the better the bonding with baby is. So anything I can do to prepare myself I will try.

What are some labor prepping tricks you've heard of?

Nut Up The Nose

As a child I stuck many a thing up my nose..Really. I did. I remember peas, twice...at least. A raisin or two. I don't really know what my fasination with jamming things up my nose was but I heard the stories of how my mother retireved such items many times.

As a mother I've been waiting for the first "up the nose" experience. Wondering what it would be. Big girl, at the age of 4 1/2, has never stuck anything up her nose, that I know of, and if she did it's still up there. And little girl, at 3, hadn't either. I just figured it would be my son who would christen the "up the nose" experience. ............. Until today.

We got home from my dr appointment and Hubs gave the girls some trailmix and all the sudden little girl starts crying and screaming. Hubs and I look over and ask whats wrong and Big girl informs us "non put a nut up her nose" I, being the good mother that I am, sat there and watched Hubs try to get big girl to blow it out of her nose into a tissue, as I chuckled silently about the phrase "nut up the nose" I sat and watched thinking "that's not gonna work. That's not how to you get things out of noses" In my infinate mother wisdom I pry my behind off the couch and go get my tweezers to fix this situation before it esclates into full on drama.

I grab little girls head, tell her to hold still and promptly pull the nut out of her nose and exclaim "Good grief child! How'd that fit up your nose" (it was a big nut) She's sobbing, I'm chuckling still (Probably not the best thing to do in that situation but whatever).. I calm her down and try to explain that we don't put -anything- up our noses, especially nuts.

Then big girl pipes up "Non put TWO Nuts up her nose" ...... Are ya CRAPPIN' me kid?!?!?! So I examine her nose thinking theres no way another nut could fit up there and I hear "Juuuust kidding" ........ I stopped giggling at that point.

I've officially been christened as a mother.. Foreign object up the nose.

Tuesday's 10: Things That Might Make Hubs Leave Me

I've fallen off the blogging wagon..more or less because I am 15 months pregnant. So in honor of today's Tuesday 10 I give you:

10 Things That Might Make Hubs Leave Me Before I Have This Child:


1. I've become bossy. More bossy than usual. I'm having more and more emotional breakdowns, usually about how things aren't ready or perfectly planned,or the oven isn't clean enough and I'm saying the phrase "Make it happen!" more and more often. Along with the phrase "I don't care! Figure it out!!" God Bless that man!

2. I'm averaging 3lbs of strawberries a week. Unfortunatly for Hubs I saw in the Albertsons flyer that this week they have 3lbs of strawberries for $3.99.. Limit is 2.. He'll be going and buying 2... most likely every other day. He's told me I have to stop or else he'll have to take out a loan.

3. I commonly refer to myself as a Narwhal and to take me outside and toss cool dirt on me to cool me down, like they do to the stranded whales.

4. I'm having a major nesting issue. Hubs is always looking for his boots or a power cord or some other piece of something that I have "put away" and don't remember where I put them because I have preggo brain.

5. I've threatened to get him schnackered and give him a home "man surgery" if he doesn't stop knocking me up.

6. Mornings don't work out well for me. I'm not my normal, beautiful, shining, vibrant self. I'm more along the lines of serial killer. I've heard the phrase uttered "Kids..don't even look at your mom..don't talk to her, just leave..her..alone" I'm thinking that all the 'breakfast in bed' I've been getting are not because he's being sweet.. I think he's more or less protecting himself and the kids from me until I have food in my system.

7. I can only sleep in a certain position...which means Hubs is confined to a certain position.. I'm not sure if it's a comfortable position or not for him........ I feel a little bit bad about that.

8. My normal outfit at home is his huge long sleeve Winter PT shirt. It's huge on him and he's 6ft, 230lbs... It's really not attractive on me. I also sport a pair of his PT shorts... which look like I'm wearing a parachute.

9. During the first few months of this pregnancy his smell offended me. His normal bodily smell made me wanna hurl. (that's eased up a bit, though)

10. He's not allowed to talk about women who aren't pregnant. They are skinny, happy, perky, and in good moods. I consider all threats. He gets an earful when his soldiers (who are females and aren't pregnant) ask me "are you ready to have that baby yet" I tell him he better smoke them... Im not sure if he actually does..ok, he probably doesn't. I don't *really* hate females.. I'm just 900lbs and 15 months pregnant.



Dear Hubs.. If you are reading this.. I love you. Please don't leave me. I will be normal again in a month or so. I promise. It's all your sons fault. He's doing this to me. You're incredible and haven't left me yet..except for the other night when you left..but you brought back icecream so you're forgiven. I love you! hehehehe :-D

There arose such a clatter................ In El Paso

It was 12:30am. All was quiet in sleepy house. Pregs had just fallen into a blissful sleep when all of a sudden there arose such a clatter.... our doorbell being obnoxiously hit upon...time and time again. So, being the strong Army wife that I am I woke up hubs... My first thought being that if we are about to get robbed I want him to open the door, but then I realized nobody rings a doorbell before they rob you....or do they? Maybe they were polite theives.. Or Police, in which case it would be best if Hubs answered the door anyways because I freeze around Police. Throw my hands up and say "OKAY I DID IT!!! TAKE ME!" even if I didn't. (I'm Police-a-phobic)

Hubs got up and stood there by the door..........while they continued their assult on our doorbell. I'm not exactly sure why he just stood there instead of opening the door so they could quit their assult because at this point I was scared I would have two kids awake also and I didn't want them to see me being taken away to jail for some unknown crime.

He finally snapped out of it and did his manly duty and found out what the "intruders" wanted.

Turns out that the 'intruders' were none other than the "Samoans 3 doors down" (We totally nickname all our neighbors, they live next to 'Smokers magoo') letting us know that our dome lights were on in the car.

I didn't know whether to be pleased that they were so kind to alert us or irritated that they thought it was acceptable to blow up my doorbell in such a manner when my house was obviously dark and after 5 minutes of nobody answering the door, they still continued on their mission.

I'm leaning more towards irritated because should our battery have died Hubs could have dealt with that at 430am when he got up, but I'm kinda mean like that.

Hubs and pregs fell into a blissful (okay, well, he did) sleep with our last words being "wow.. That was weird"

Pregs heaved a sigh of relief that, once again, she missed the strong arm of the Law.


And to all A GoodNight!

Tuesday's 10

1. Parent Teacher confrences were today. I am SO proud of my big girl! She's doing amazing and all the issues that were brought up last time she has fixed and is doing wonderfully. PROUD momma!! Her teachers exact words "Whatever you are doing with her, keep it up" Yay!

2. Theres drama at Hubs work. He's being shafted. This really, -really- pisses me off. Written up for something that was not his fault and it was worded in a way that makes it sound waaayyy worse than what it was and doesn't tell the whole story. Mess with those I love and I will be your worst nightmare! 16 weeks until we are done.. 16 weeks! The part that makes me mad, everything we have given to this unit, 3 years of deployments, 8 years of service and this is what we get 16 weeks before we are done. This is the treatment we get. I'm, frankly, about to cut my volunteer ties with the unit at this point.

3. Yup..I totally put that out there. No, I dont care.

4. I have the worlds biggest headache

5. My body is a on a "sleep crappy for 3 nights, pass out 1 night" cycle. I hate it. Unfortnatly, I'm on day 2 of "crappy sleep" tonight.

6. My youngest is making me so tired lately. Her moods, her drama, her crying and fits..no napping during the day, fighting sleep at night *sigh*

7. From 630am until nearly 9pm I am Mom.. 100% mom. no breaks. I am so so exausted

8. I'm looking forward to being in the hospital after Boy is born. Medicine, I get to stay in bed, they bring me food, I can watch whatever I want on my tv. Labor..totally worth it. Homebirth..no way Jose. I'm not about to have a baby then get up and make dinner.

9. Craving crunchy things. Ate a whole bag of Pita chips yesterday.

10. It's looking to be the same sort of deal today only with Tortilla chips